Dear Democrat and Republican leaders,
I would like to offer my assistance in this debt crisis business. I am a public school teacher, and for the first six years of my career, I worked in an urban setting. Many gang members attended my school, and no one considered gang affiliation in the zoning process. Therefore, I (obviously) had classes comprised of a variety of gang members.
When creating cooperative learning groups, I didn’t group by gang. Somehow, these sworn enemies would sit in my English class and grudgingly work together. I distinctly remember a Blood, Crip, and MS13 member who became such good friends that they shared their gang signs with each other. (For you privileged leaders, this is akin to sharing your fraternity or sorority secret handshakes with each other.) Now, please don’t think this ability to get gang members to work together is some secret power that only I possess. All public school teachers develop this ability by the second year, or they find another career.
So what does this have to do with you? Well, if you let me be part of your discussions on how to solve this debt crisis, I think I can help facilitate your discussion. I can get the Republicans (the Bloods) and the Democrats (the Crips) to sit down and come to an agreement. (I guess I shouldn’t leave out the Tea Party members. Which gang should they be? Hmmm… The craziest one, I guess.) I think we can have it all wrapped up in a few days. If I bring my teacher friends, we can have it wrapped up in a couple of hours, tops.
When we’ve got the debt crisis solved, we can move on to education reform. Believe me, we need that, too.
Let me know soon if you want my help. I only have one week of summer break left.
Sincerely,
Annie Leggett
Excellent!
You are hilarious.